The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

She said to me once “if it weren’t for me you’d be some kind of hermit.” It was one of those half-joking, half serious conversations regarding how different we were at heart. You see, I was the typical ‘doesn’t play well with others’ trouble child and she was the happy and outgoing socialite, but we [...]

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Nightfall

The lamp lights threw deceptive shadows, but now we are outside as the snow falls silently around us. She looks at me with something approaching confusion and I, I feel alive in a few senses numb in others. It is as though I am scattered ashes, some of which still glow, embers of previous flames, [...]

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Late Rising

Bitterness is like a cancer that eats away at your heart; it rots out a little piece every day until eventually all you can feel is rage. To overcome it can take a supreme effort of the will, but most of all you need to know that the person who gets really hurt if you [...]

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I The Throwaway

Gets to you in the end, what do you want? What are you after? What part of me are you interested in, let the rest rot and fester? You feel like a pick and mix robot from whom people only ever want a couple of spare pieces; hmm yes I’ll take the bits I’ve got time [...]

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Phoenix

Burnt to cinders, my dear, all hope and no soul to our particular tragedy but worry not for it is but a minor storm in a veritable whirlwind and I’ve picked myself back off the canvas more times than even I now remember. Coming back twice as strong, twice as confident with something of a [...]

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Earning Your Stripes

There is a bowl of fruit in my room, stands next to the half drunk bottle of Jack Daniels and an opened, slightly forgotten copy of Euripides’ Hippolytos; it is part of my attempt to reverse the slow process of killing myself with a diet of alcohol and tobacco. By day I drink black coffee, tackle the rank [...]

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Fallout

Last night I think I may have temporarily gone insane, or at least I was having some thoughts that were out-and-out bonkers. I woke up this morning feeling washed up and after a few minutes I realized that I had completely run out of reasons to get up so I simply lay in bed and [...]

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Empty Space.

Grief, my dear, just a pang in the heart a sorrow to last a lifetime we’ll be flitting like birds no more since this dark and dour and deathly still storm wind twists blazing trails in the sky see, I recall nights when starts were piercing diamond, the sky so cold it might shatter when [...]

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Balcony Scene

There she stood hands upon the rail looking out onto the night, I couldn’t tell what she was looking at or if indeed she was looking at anything in particular, perhaps the lights of the city that flickered behind me, perhaps something in her mind’s eye. I never knew what she was looking at before, I didn’t [...]

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You Know You’re Not Ready For Suicide When…

You don’t really know what you’d write in your suicide note, nor who you’d address it to; perhaps you should just get some sleep instead.

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